


Meet Cat's Parents

by aggiepuff, Whedonista93



Series: Cracktastic Mega Crossover [1]
Category: That '70s Show, Victorious (TV)
Genre: Crack, F/M, Gen, Pure Crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-28
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-14 13:27:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29046870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aggiepuff/pseuds/aggiepuff, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whedonista93/pseuds/Whedonista93
Summary: Cat pokes her head around the curtain and bounces excitedly. “Oh, my dad’s here!”
Relationships: Jackie Burkhart/Steven Hyde
Series: Cracktastic Mega Crossover [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2130234
Comments: 4
Kudos: 21





	Meet Cat's Parents

**Author's Note:**

> We basically asked ourselves: "How much crack can we fit?"

Cat pokes her head around the curtain and bounces excitedly. “Oh, my dad’s here!”

Jade rolls her eyes. “Doesn’t your dad come to all your performances?”

“Yeah.”

“So who cares?”

“Don’t listen to her, Cat,” Tori puts an arm around the shorter girl’s shoulders. “I think it’s great that your dad comes to all your shows.”

Cat smiles brightly. “You guys wanna meet him after?”

“Sure thing, Lil’ Red,” Andre shoots her a thumbs up before sauntering off toward his position on the stage.

When the show ends, Cat leaps directly off the stage and makes a bee line for a man in the very back corner of the auditorium. Her friends follow more slowly, taking in their friend’s father. Beat up boots, weathered jeans, a vintage rock tee, sandy curls, and aviators despite the fact they’re in a dark theater. His face is impassive until Cat bounds up.

Cat literally bounces into his open arms. “Daddy!”

A grin replaces his stoic expression. “Hey, baby girl.”

Cat extracts herself from his arms and starts babbling excitedly.

Her dad reaches out and puts his hands on her shoulders. “Zen, kiddo.”

Cat visibly calms and give a serious nod. “Zen.”

He jerks his chin over her shoulder. “Who’re your friends?”

Cat brightens and bounces again. “Oh! This is Jade, and Beck, and Robbie, and Tori, and Andre!”

“Oi, what about me?” Rex demands.

Cat grimaces. “And that’s Rex.”

Her dad frowns. “That’s disturbing.”

Beck shrugs. “You get used to it. Nice to meet you, Mr. Valentine.”

An amused smirk crosses his face. “Oh, that’s awful. ‘Mr. Valentine’.” 

“You look really familiar, sir,” Andre observes.

Hyde shudders. “Shit, kid, no sir, seriously. And I guess I’ve got one of those faces.”

Cat giggles. “Daddy doesn’t like to be called sir.”

“Got it. So, you coming to the after party or going home with your dad?”

“Oh shoot!” Tori straightens. “I forgot! We can’t have the after party at my house. My dad’s having his boss over for dinner.”

A chorus of groans sounds.

“It’s okay, guys! We can have the party at my house!” Cat offers. “Right, Daddy?”

Hyde nods. “Sure, baby girl.”

Cat claps. “Thank you!”

Beck nods as Hyde strolls away. “Your dad’s chill.”

Cat shrugs. “He calls it zen.”

“Lemme guess, you take after your mom?” Jade asks drolly.

Cat just nods happily.

The group makes quick work of cleaning up before making their way to Cat’s house, which is really more of a mansion in Hollywood Hills.

Rex whistles. “Dang, girl. I didn’t know you were loaded.”

“Loading what?” Cat asks as she opens the door.

Rex just groans and shakes his head.

“Hey, should we have stopped for snacks?” Andre asks. “I’m starving.”

Someone behind them laughs. “If there is one thing there’s _never_ a shortage of in this house, it’s snacks.”

Andre turns and gapes. He reaches blindly until he’s hitting Cat’s arm. “Lil’ Red’...”

“Hmm?” Cat looks over at him.

“Jackie Burkhardt is in your house.”

Cat laughs. “Duh. She lives here.” Cat waves. “Hi, Mom!”

Jackie smiles. “Hi, sweetheart.”

Andre continues frantically tapping Cat’s arm. “Your mom is Jackie Burkhardt?!”

“Who’s Jackie Burkhardt?” Rex asks, clearly unimpressed.

“Dude, she’s like, one of the most famous actresses in Hollywood!” Robbie nearly screeches.

“Is she in those girly flicks you like?”

Beck shrugs. “She’s done plenty of romcoms, sure, but she’s also in the High Times trilogy.”

“Are those the ones about the stoner cop?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Cat answers. “She based her character off Uncle Kelso. Mom and dad both say he was stoned through most of his time into the police academy.”

“Andre, you’re drooling,” Jade sneers, though not with as much venom as usual - she appears a bit dazed as well.

“So’s your boyfriend,” Tori needles.

Beck shrugs unrepentantly. “Duh. It’s Jackie Burkhardt.”

Cat spots a battered guitar case in the corner and squeals. “Is Drake here?”

Jackie smiles. “Yeah, baby, he’s in the kitchen with your dad.”

Cat skip-runs away, leaving her friends still gaping at her mom.

Jackie smirks and rolls her eyes. “Lemme guess, she never told you who her parents were?”

Tori snaps out of the daze first. “No. And sorry, we’re being totally rude. Kinda caught us off guar- wait. Jackie Burkhardt.”

“ _Yeessss_ ,” Jackie drawls and raises an eyebrow.

Tori turns and shoves Andre lightly. “That’s why her Dad looked familiar!”

Andres just gives her a ‘What?’ expression.

“Jackie Burkhardt is married to Steven Hyde! He owns Point Place Grooves!”

Robbie’s eyes go wide. “The record label?”

“Yes!”

Jackie starts laughing. “Cat really never told any of you who her family was.”

“Not a peep,” Jade confirms testily.

Jackie laughs harder. “Okay, I love my daughter dearly, but I didn’t think she had it in her.”

“Yeah, lying really isn’t her strong suit.”

“Awh,” Cat coos, coming back into the room, dragging a brunet in a leather jacket by the arm with her, “that’s so nice, Jade!”

Tori holds up a finger and points, voice going a bit dreamy. “Drake Parker.”

Drake salutes. “Cat’s peeps.”

Andre takes a deep breath, finally starting to recover. “Lil’ Red, later, we are going to have a conversation about the kind of information you’re supposed to share with your friends.”

Cat shrugs. “Kk.”


End file.
